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Ladies and Gents
Retail out-let
A spokes person for the trading of ladies and gent's outfitting in the West Country said that due to the recession, trousers were down in the west country, whilst kilts in Scotland were up, gloves on the other hand were waving, shirts in the midlands were lifting (probably due to junk foods). Hire wear was rather low and socks were being suspended in every walk whilst shirt sleeves were being restricted due to the tightening up of arm bands and braces were being stretched to their limits, he also said I'll be brief when I say that boxers now cost six knickers and were mainly pants. Over coats were going under and tailed coats were being cut, the fact that hats came out on top and shoes were at ground level was another matter. He also added that the Monk's habit (what ever that was) should be acknowledged.
He then added that in the ladies department, knickers were falling drastically (due to shoddy elastication) and retail outlets were no longer selling see-through blouses because customers thought that shopkeepers were hiding them. He added that due to a fault in machinery, bras were being turned out at the rate of three a breast, mini skirts were on the short list, suspender belts were out in favour of chewing gum and blue tack and that the unraveling revelations of woolly jumpers were going up and down, which would imply the casting off of any more knitting machines for the time being, whilst out-sized clothes were at large in most shops.
He finished his speech saying that he hopes to see an end to all of this silly nonsense in the near future.
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